The Meaning of Pleasure in Tantra
It is impossible to lead a colourful life without contrast: pain and pleasure are the primary colours.
As a London tantric masseuse, I would like to share my view on pleasure based on my own experience. I regard myself as a fortunate individual whose life is continuously in direct contact with physical pleasure and, consequently, have become someone who is no stranger to the prolongation of feelings of bliss, serenity, and inspiration—and I could not stress enough how amazing it feels to be paid for this.
Pleasure, in all its facets, is the most powerful tool for inspiring learning and growth. It keeps us engaged with life, it is a fountain of youth and health and has a positive effect on our mental and physical wellbeing. It is no wonder that, for this reason, human beings have striven throughout their whole existence to find the elixir of life that fades away the shadow of pain that inevitably follows us in our reality.
Our society revolves around pleasure, be it any leisure activity, such as going to a concert, shopping, admiring the arts, travelling, eating and drinking, or simply relaxing and enjoying casual or intimate relationships with others. We often live in denial when pain strikes us and it seems that it is insurmountable. Seeking pleasure in this mental state is no longer an antidote, but a blindfold. It is only when we embrace pain, we confront it, accept it, and allow it to destroy us that we can reconstruct ourselves and emerge from the ashes as the phoenix. It is only then, when we truly embrace pain this way that pleasure becomes an opposing force that will keep our lives in balance. Think of Newton’s third law of motion…
I have always sought pleasure in the form of experiences, rather than collecting things. Surely, our material world offers an overwhelming choice of stuff we can possess, enjoy, and treasure, however, the downside of this is wear and tear, our inability to continually value the meaning of our possessions and eventually dispose of them, and the sense of incompleteness that comes with a focus on a materialistic lifestyle. In order to keep our zest for life, rather than only indulge in the safe comfort of our material world and fall prey to monotony, one needs to get out of the ordinary and complement the pleasure we gain from collecting things with the pleasure from collecting great memories. And, as we all know, sex is a central idea in the notion of pleasure.
Indulging in a world of intimacy by the hour may seem an expensive hobby. Enjoying the company of a tantric masseuse might appear a luxury, but, consider this, how many times have you been out in Central London and spend over £200 on a dinner, drinks and tickets to some kind of event? I am sure that you have pampered yourself this way many more times than paying for a tantric massage. That is why I believe that seeking the services of a tantric massage agency or an independent London tantric masseuse should be considered as an additional form of pleasure. Sex, after all, is one of the most powerful dopamine stimulators.
Pleasure is not something we can pay for at the till, though, it is a sensation that one experiences within our own body and mind. We have all certainly heard that ‘money does not buy happiness’ and although pleasurable experiences can provide us with momentary feelings of happiness, it is our responsibility not to become addicted to these external experiences to feel a short-lived feeling of joy. Sex can be addictive, yet this should not mean one can learn how to abandon oneself into sexual pleasure without falling trap of an addictive behaviour. Pleasure should be a gateway to general happiness. By being present in each moment and choosing to be caring, kind and compassionate with love toward ourselves and others, the shift from pleasure to happiness takes place.
Resorting to the services of a tantric masseuse should not be regarded merely as a business transaction nor as a vice as many would be inclined to think. Sex is sharing a connection where energy flows around the circuit of two bodies to bring light in a form of an orgasmic moment. During the sexual act, an exchange of different dynamics unfold to pleasure our companion, and we learn how important it is to give and receive. It is here where we precisely have the choice to practise sex in a meaningful way, exchange a part of our sexual and mental world with kindness and love, or take it as a casual experience to just satisfy a biological need. When sex becomes more than satisfying an animalistic instinct, sexual pleasure can lead us to an inspiring happy place.
I hope my pleasure is your pleasure. To give is a gift.
Nerea, an Independent Tantric Masseuse in London