TANTRIC MASSAGE IN LONDON
This is my specialty. Tantra, tantric sex, tantric massage, they are all terms that carry some kind of obscure, esoteric meaning many people do not seem to understand. Tantra is an Indian philosophy in itself, and as with all academic matters, a clear-cut definition of Tantra is still theorised. However, tantric massaging and tantric sex represent an angle of this philosophy and there are words and strategies to describe what it entails.
Tantric sex is a form of orgasmic meditation. It applies the principles of attention, mindfulness, breathing, rhythm and spiritual connection that yoga preaches. Whether you are interested or not in leading your sex life in a more spiritual way, tantric sex has a practical focus that will benefit you regardless of your personal beliefs.
Too often, the dreaded ‘passion drift’ sets into our sex life after a few years of responsibilities and periods of difficult challenges (my posts ‘The Creative Mind in Tantric Sex’ and ‘How to be Sexually Creative’ discuss the key elements to deal with sexual boredom). Paying attention to your sexuality should be one of your priorities. Why? Because by nourishing ourselves by a process of connection and biological gratification we fuel all the other areas in our lives. Our sex life is crucial in maintaining good mental and physical health, as are our degree of physical fitness, the quality of food we eat and the number of hours we sleep. It is a shame that saying: ‘I’m going to hit the gym on my lunch break’ sounds all right, whereas: ‘I’m going for a meditative orgasm’ would be very much frowned upon. Our physical, mental and sexual health are the foundation for our successful careers and relationships with colleagues, friends, relatives and partners.
To be clear, tantric sex focuses on an overall state of orgasm. Climaxing is only a few seconds of intense physical pleasure while the state of orgasm is the continuous, heightened state of consciousness and pleasure before the big release. My approach is not based on a hand-relief practice. I believe the non-ejaculation view is interesting between couples, but I am not an advocate of ending a tantric massage with this technique. I relish every stroke, every touch, every kiss, every lick. I have developed the ability to derive pleasure from my tantric massaging as the flow of energy becomes a cycle, passing between my body and the recipient’s and building up a reciprocal exchange of pleasure. So the ecstasy is mutual!
WHAT TO EXPECT FROM MY TANTRIC MASSAGE SESSION
Experience. I have been practising Tantra for 7 years. I have been trained and instructed by internationally respected tantric teachers. In addition, I hold qualifications in sports massage, reflexology and I’m currently taking a Reiki course. In addition, if you are interested in taking a Tantra workshop with your partner, I am in the process of preparing a weekend course in central London.
Professionalism and discretion. I endeavour to provide a professional service. My ethos is based on presenting genuine pictures of myself, which you can browse on my gallery. They are not heavily retouched and do faithfully portray what I look like. I understand the importance of discretion as this should be reciprocal. I try to text back at working times and I would not call clients unless I have been given expressed permission. In any case, my need to call a client is very rare, unless I am lost and need to ask for directions to meet them. If I need to cancel an appointment, I do it by text message. In addition, if we are meeting for a diner date before proceeding with a tantric massage session, my dress code is elegant and sexy, yet discreet.
Strict hygiene. I cannot stress enough how off putting is to experience the exchange of foul body odour. It is for this reason I make sure I will not burden a client with this issue, however, I do expect mutual criteria. Having said this, you would be surprised how many clients I have to send back to the shower. Please, read my post on this subject (Tantric Massage and Hygiene), as I explain how exactly you should implement correct standards of hygiene. You will be greeted with a towel and expected to have a shower at my flat. You are more than welcome to take a second shower after our session. My shower gel is Sanex which is not heavily scented and I have men’s deodorant. Do not brush or floss your teeth an hour before or after our encounter (refer to my post Tantric Masseuses in London and STIs).
HOW IS THE TANTRIC MASSAGE CONDUCTED?
Tantric massage setting
The ambiance of the environment you receive your massage in should lead to sensuous, stimulating sex. The use of diffusers to create serenity should certainly be expected. Relaxing music is played to provide a background of tranquility and help activate the senses.
A wide variety of oils and creams can be used for tantric massage. However, I only use organic cold pressed coconut oil sparingly as I need to achieve a certain grip; too much of a slippery skin is not the right condition for my technique. I place a lot of importance on the products I use on myself. As a matter of fact, I do not use creams as moisturisers because ingredients tend to be toxic chemicals. Coconut oil has a very slight smell, it can easily be washed off if you take a shower after our session, and it is perfectly edible, not to mention all the health benefits it contains. I do not use essential oils because I am not a specialist in aromatherapy. The wrong application of essential oil can be harmful as it gets absorbed into the bloodstream. Did you know you could survive on coconut if you only had one food to eat? This is due to its complex and rich molecular composition.
This is the moment to get to know each other and understand what is expected and included in the session so there are no misunderstandings. It is an opportunity to share previous experiences, raise your concerns or make a request. The payment can be made at this point. The standard etiquette is that money is exchanged before the massage service starts.
Setting the mood for lovemaking starts well before sex, this is what I term ‘outerplay’. I will start the session by your feet whilst you are lying face down. When it comes to touching and feeling, acupressure can enhance our sexual rapport. There are techniques and trigger points that can booster the right sexual responses and, in turn, help maximise pleasure. I will stimulate different areas on your feet, such as those related to your prostate, which supports ejaculation, the brain, which heightens libido and stimulates imagination, and the adrenal glands, which increase your overall energy.
Body to body massage (lower body)
After I have finished massaging your feet, I will massage your legs with my stomach and breasts. In addition, I will apply different pressure techniques that will enhance a feeling of relaxation.
The next phase is my erotic massage coupled with some breathing. I will be concentrating on your buttocks, testicles, perianal and anal areas. This part of the session is highly erotic and you are expected to synchronise your breathing with my touching. You will probably have an erection by then. However, in order to prolong the sensations you need to control your breathing. You will guide me so to prevent early ejaculation, some men find it challenging to hold on but with some guidance the session will go on by gradually peaking and dipping. The aim is to not ejaculate. Nevertheless, at this point some men experience internal orgasms without ejaculation. Edging can make you more intensely conscious of your own sexual control, both solo and with a tantric masseuse, adding mindfulness into your sexual life.
During our consultation, you will raise any concerns about your preference for this kind of massage. I do encourage you to try it out if you have never done so. If you are a first timer, I would only do it very gently and never go over your comfort zone.
Body to body massage (upper body)
The masseuse is completely naked and uses every part of her body to stimulate the receiver—my entire body will surf your back, buttocks and legs. The focus is on using body weight and although hands are used they are not the main point of pressure. This is a very sensual massage that if it is properly done will create an arousal effect. However, the masseuse needs to be experienced enough as this is a very physical style of massage that requires a good coordination of body movement, rhythm and pressure. At this stage, coconut oil needs to cover most of your back, but as was mentioned earlier, only a small quantity is applied, and never on the hair.
My head massage is a particular technique for which hands are not used, should you worry about any oil getting to your hair. This is a moment to regain a feeling of relaxation coupled with the lasting effects of the previous sensuous techniques. Once completed, it is time to turn over.
I will concentrate on your feet and legs. This is the time to apply some Reiki energy. You will feel a wave of heat crawling up your legs up to your testicles. Reiki in sex helps you to relax; thus you become more sensitive to touch and the experience of pleasure. Reiki also unblocks your energy channels, i.e. meridians, which further improves the flow of your sexual energy through your body. This will result in longer and more pleasurable lovemaking.
It is the phase to worship your phallus, your ‘wand of light’. Tantra massage is meant to awaken your kundalini energy through your lingam or yoni—in a woman’s case. By awakening your kundalini flow of energy it enables you to disperse your emotions and sensations to various parts of your body and thus better reach a full-body orgasm.
You will now show me your sexual talent. Sex is not complete without reciprocity. I am open to different sexual practices such as kissing, mutual touching and oral sex. I take pleasure in receiving and I do expect my lovemaker to explore my body so we can both equally enjoy our encounter. To give is a gift.
After our session, you may experience how the vibrations in your head and the lightness of your body become apparent in your consciousness. You will then be enwrapped in a blanket of calmness and lightness.
I have often seen the incorrect use of the terms ‘Lingam’ and ‘Yoni’. You should be suspicious of any tantric masseuse or agency who claims to offer yoni massages if their services only cater for men. ‘Lingam’ is the male sexual organ in Sanskrit, whereas ‘Yoni’ is the female organ. Therefore, you will notice that I do not offer yoni massage because I am heterosexual and do not offer a tantric sex service for couples or women. However, I run Tantra group workshops for which you are more than welcome to attend with your partner regardless of your sexual orientation.